Tugged Apart...

What is it that keeps lingering to me?
From the dark corners of life I lived long.
What is it that keeps haunting me on?
Bewildered, they keep coming strong.

How is it I still feel the blaze of noon,
While I look up to the setting sun,
How is it I feel this chilled cold
Yet I stand to face the burning gun.

A shot of bullet, a piercing sound
echoes a hole around
through my body bone and flesh,
Yet no blood round my mesh.

The scar still sore,
Yet to heal
But I wondered who did it?
Why these Goosebumps chill up my neck?
of things undone and I still regret.

At last I could see the blood ooze out
Not 'Present' nor 'Future'
My 'Past' revolved around
And I being helpless look around
How do I cling off this hungry hound?

Hollow sounds rechoted within,
And day in and day out,
My vain efforts got bound
Sometimes I could find myself at rest
Just to turn around for another mess.

The soil go soft beneath,
My feet and toes go all numb,
I sow down deeper into land
My past sucks me into the never-ending quicksand!!

But arrogant and ignorant me,
failed to see those smiles around
of not mockery or jeer,
A hand of help lent out.
And all I did was to look away
And follow trails to the smiles of the dead.

And now, I realized my folly,
forgot my worth of being jolly.
Of what I meant for others was first,
Welcomed my present all happy and glory.

I held up my hand
to hold those around
A hug, a push, affection I felt,
Oh. the past still dreads behind,
but I am too loved by 'Present'
Happy and glorified to let it bend....